91's Setelah Aku Kau Miliki

Hiya Mr. Bloggy,

I'm feeling a lil bit mellow today. As I listen to this, hey.. it's kinda nice. The lyrics fit fine with what I'm feeling at the moment. Anyway, I just feel like sharing the lyrics here. It's in Malay though. This is a song performed by Shima in 1991's Juara Lagu. The title is: Setelah Aku Kau Miliki.

Setelah Aku Kau Miliki
Shima

Mereka lihat ku tersenyum
Gembira bagai tiada duka
Begitu indah dipandangan
Tapi hatiku keretakan bagai sinar
Purnama terang yang terbakar

Setelah aku kau miliki
Mana janjimu yang sejati
Segala bagai kiambang
Zahirnya nampak berkembangan
Akar tak jejak di dasaran
Terluka cintamu itu

( korus )
Jelmaan yang mendatang
Meragut menggoda
Membenam binasa cinta
Aku di genggaman
Engkau lepaskan
Kerna memburu khayalanmu
Yang menjanjikan
Rembulan keribaanmu
Engkau kehancuran

Tidakku mampu membencimu
Biarpun cuba ku lepaskan
Tapi rantaimu mengunciku
Di kota cinta jelmaanmu
Tidakku rela dibinasa
Bersama cintamu itu

Lost in Emotion: Crush < Love > Infatuation

Crush Turtle from Disney's Finding Nemo

Hey there old friend, Mr. Bloggy..

I know, I know... It is indeed my fault for abandoning you... How long has it been?? My goodness..it is almost a year since I last wrote you an entry... Please forgive me. In my defense, errr... Twitter! Blame it on Twitter...and Instagram too. Those are major distractions these days. :)

Do you remember the Crush Turtle from "Finding Nemo"?! Well... Number one, I'm not gonna talk about the turtle. Number two, I just wanna share about my feelings. Huhu. Thus, our theme for this entry is "Lost in Emotion".

Some people believe that having crushes is just for kids. I beg to differ. If that's the case, why am I still having that tingling sensation whenever I set my eyes on certain people?! I am now officially 26...oh wait... could it be 27? I was born on 27 Dec 1987. So, how old am I now exactly?! Cricket...cricket... Anyway, at my age, I still enjoy having crushes on certain people. One definite reason is due to availability issue. I know I can never have them FOR REAL. So, let them be stored in my crush account. Be reminded that a crush feeling can prolong for a period of time and it can re-emerge one day once the 'switch' is triggered.

Now, let's talk about love.Yup. I am positive. What is love? Love is defined as the most spectacular, deep, sometimes indescribable feeling for someone (Urban Dictionary, 2005). Such a strong word if you ask me. In short, love is a feeling. A feeling is developed when something or someone triggers your specific emotion(s) that drives you to do something in return (Ahmad Niza, 2013). To sum it up, love is a committed feeling for someone/something. Ok, that's my interpretation. Is it hard to love? Well, it depends. It took me three minutes to love a cat. It took me three years to love a dear friend. Kidding. Kidding. You know when you're in love, you become restless. You feel incomplete. You smirk in public. You smile reading a simple "Ok" text message. You skip your meals just to be with him/her. You pretend to like what he/she likes. When you're in love, your world is colorful. Life is a land of colorful rainbow with unicorns in it. Bottom line; you are not yourself when you're in love! (p/s - This is not based on my experience..just merely my observation :P)

Moving on, INFATUATION. This is when you have a crush-like feeling for a short period of time. Unlike crush, infatuation is just temporary. Unlike love, it's easier to wipe of your feeling for someone if it's just an infatuation. In different perspective, infatuation can happen at the early stage of love. This is when you question yourself; "Why do I love him/her?" Is this "Love" or "Lust"? This feeling can be addictive if you keep clinging on the sweet lovey-dovey memories of the ever confusing love feeling. Infatuation is when you are being selfish with your desires. Yes, it drives you mad. It is also indescribable sometimes. One thing to know whether you're infatuating is after you get what you desire (i.e: Having a kiss), you feel like that's the last. It's like; "Oh, ok..so that's how it feels to kiss." Whatever it is, I have to say.. the feeling is still intense.

Be it a crush, love or an infatuation, you have to take care of your feelings. Don't drive it over the limit or else, you'll be devastated and heartbroken. They say in Bahasa, "Nak kene servis hati". Yup, our heart needs proper care and service too. How to service your heart? Proper dieting is highly encouraged. Hehe. Kidding. Well, you need to evaluate your feelings. Consider your feelings and the other party's too. Are you ready to handle the conflicts to come? Human beings are complex. Don't expect the other party to have the same feeling like you. The levels might differ and sometimes it's not mutual. My advice is, learn to love by learning about your partner. Observe and pay attention.

Ok, it's time to put an end to this crap. Honestly, I have no idea what the hell did I just write???? It's 12.52 AM and I am already sleepy. Goodnight.

Till we meet again Mr. Bloggy, toodles :)

Baby names.. I want, I want!

Salam and good day peeps,

Okay... Happy New Year. 2013! Oh man, there are so many things I have yet to achieve in 2012 and now it's 2013?! Whaaaaat.... Well, it is new year..new page..new resolutions. My three ultimate goals every year, also my woolgathering ultimatums are: HEHE :p

1) To earn money without working.

2) To love without being hurt.

3) To eat without getting fat.

2013: Will I find my soul mate?

This entry is dedicated for my future planning (in case I might forget one day which I know I will). This is just a pre-plan for my future babies (insyaAllah, ameen). Why?? Oh boy. Some of my friends have already had more than one baby and I am nowhere near that!!! Jealousy? Well yeah..haven't you noticed how adorable those babies are? Totally cute! I want one, please.....

Therefore, I have thought of some possible names for my babies.. Here they are:

Baby boys:

1) Ahmad Alif Mizwar (meaning: a close friend who loves to visit)

2) Ahmad Faris Awatif (meaning: my lovely warrior)

3) Ahmad Thaqif Hanzalah (meaning: smart and respectful)

Baby girls:

1) Nur Nisrin Iman (meaning: the trustworthy scent of roses)

2) Nur Hanna Insyirah (meaning: wide and ease of sustenance)

3) Nur Nawwar Husna: (meaning: pleasant light giver)

Wah..imagine this: Ahmad Alif Mizwar bin Ahmad or Nur Nisrin Iman binti Ahmad. How gratifying! I love it. InsyaAllah..one day. :)

I would like to share some do'a in the hope of getting a soleh or solehah child.

1) SURAH ALI-IMRAN AYAT 38


رَبِّ هَبْ لِى مِن لَّدُنْكَ ذُرِّيَّةً طَيِّبَةً إِنَّكَ سَمِيعُ الدُّعَآءِ

“Wahai Tuhanku! Kurniakanlah kepadaku dari sisiMu zuriat keturunan yang baik,sesungguhnya Engkau sentiasa Mendengar (menerima) do’a permohonan”.

2) DOA ANAK LEMBUT HATI, SURAH AL-HASYAR (AYAT 22-24).

Dia lah Allah, yang tidak ada Tuhan melainkan Dia; Yang Mengetahui perkara yang ghaib dan yang nyata; Dia lah Yang Maha Pemurah, lagi Maha Mengasihani. ayat 22

3) DOA ANAK PANDAI BELAJAR, SURAH AL-ANBIYA (AYAT 79).

Maka Kami beri Nabi Sulaiman memahami hukum yang lebih tepat bagi masalah itu; dan masing-masing (dari mereka berdua) Kami berikan hikmat kebijaksanaan dan ilmu (yang banyak); dan Kami mudahkan gunung-ganang dan unggas memuji Kami bersama-sama dengan Nabi Daud; dan adalah Kami berkuasa melakukan semuanya itu. Al anbiya 21 : 79

4) DOA DIBERI ZURIAT MENYEJUKKAN MATA MEMANDANG, SURAH AL-FURQAAN (AYAT 74).

Dan juga mereka (yang diredhai Allah itu ialah orang-orang) yang berdoa dengan berkata: “Wahai Tuhan kami, berilah kami beroleh dari isteri-isteri dan zuriat keturunan kami: perkara-perkara yang menyukakan hati melihatnya, dan jadikanlah kami imam ikutan bagi orang-orang yang (mahu) bertaqwa. Al Furqan 25 ayat 74

5)  DOA MOHON ANAK TAAT KEPADA ALLAH, SURAH AL-BAQARAH (AYAT 128).

رَبَّنَا وَاجْعَلْنَا مُسْلِمَيْنِ لَكَ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِنَآ أُمَّةً مُّسْلِمَةً لَّكَ وَأَرِنَا مَنَاسِكَنَا وَتُبْ عَلَيْنَآ إِنَّكَ أَنتَ التَّوَّابُ الرَّحِيم

Wahai Tuhan kami! Jadikanlah kami berdua: Orang-orang Islam (yang berserah diri) kepadaMu dan jadikanlah daripada keturunan kami: Umat Islam (yang berserah diri) kepadamu dan tunjukkanlah kepada kami syariat dan cara-cara ibadat kami dan terimalah taubat kami, sesungguhnya Engkaulah Maha Penerima taubat, lagi Maha Mengasihani

6) DOA ANAK TETAP MENGERJAKAN SEMBAHYANG: (SURAH IBRAHIM: AYAT 40-41)


Wahai Tuhanku! Jadikanlah daku orang yang mendirikan sembahyang dan demikianlah juga zuriat keturunanku. Wahai Tuhan kami, perkenankanlah doa permohonanku. Wahai Tuhan kami! Berilah ampun bagiku dan bagi kedua ibu bapaku serta bagi orang-orang yang beriman, pada masa berlakunya hitungan amal dan pembalasan.

7) DOA NABI ZAKARIA A.S. SURAH ALI IMRAN: AYAT 38)



Ketika itu Nabi Zakariya berdo’a kepada TuhanNya, katanya: “Wahai Tuhanku Kurnialah kepadaku dari sisiMu keturunan yang baik; sesungguhnya Engkau sentiasa Mendengar (menerima) do’a permohonan.”

8) DOA NABI IBRAHIM A.S. (SURAH SHAFFAT: AYAT 100)
.


Wahai Tuhanku! Kurniakanlah kepadaku anak yang terhitung dari orang-orang yang soleh!

That's all peeps. Selamat beramal.

Source of do'a collection: http://alongacet.blogspot.com/2012/10/doa-untuk-mendapat-anak-soleh-atau.html

It's a growing distance between us...

Ola Mr. Bloggy,

I have been extremely lazy busy lately to update this rusty blog as I was caught up with loads of tasks and assignments. They seem endless. Tettt.. Excuses, excuses and seriously those are just some crappy excuses. I was just lazy. That's all.

Anyway, I have just read a post by my gorgeous cousin. She posted something about her daddy's birthday. Well, here's the gist... She wanted to wish her dad's special day and started narrating her text message. To her surprise, her father called. They talked and yup she did wish her dad's well-being and happiness. The thing that pertained my emotion was when she expressed how she's not being a good child for keeping a distance from her dad. I can totally relate to that.

Oh before that. This is not really a 'daddy-daughter issue'. Perhaps I should talk about my Mom as I am a son. It is just that I do not have much memories of my mom and I. She left us long ago (May Allah bless her, always...ameen). Sorry Ma, I love you dearly...as always. So, this is my issue.

Ok, continue. 

It's a growing distance between us.

17 December 2012: The day that I crazily missed Abah.  

I really miss my dad. Yeah, so thanks cuzzie I am singing my blues now. Such a blue Monday. My dad and I....(sigh).. we are not that 'best buds' kind of stuff. We are more like... 'A professional worker and his boss'. There is always unfit and mishaps done by the worker. The boss has the final say. The boss is always right. ALWAYS. It is full of bumpy rides along the way. Crazy, but that is that.

I still remember some moments when I did horrible things in life. I tried to justify and to my exasperation, I was shut off... completely..leaving me no spot to explain myself. Like I said, he likes to play King so as humble as I could be, I just listened and waited for my turns to be crushed like any other sinful servants.

It is not that we have never tried to work things out for both of us. Some did bind us for quite some times, some were inefficacious. I know for a fact that we both love each other. We do, it is just...complicated and awkward...well, mostly. To begin with, I still have no idea when or what triggered this growing distance to happen.

I wish to turn back the hands of time and figure the things I have done in the past. I somehow have a feeling that we started to grow apart when I was sent off to the boarding school. He got busy and barely had time for the family back then. For goodness sake, I could count with my fingers how many times I saw him at home in a year. (Sigh).

That was then. Now, as I become an adult and learn the hardship to build a life of my own, I understand where it went wrong with our relationship. It is the TIME we spend. The quality time of talking, talking, talking, doing things together, playing, strolling and even jogging. I am trying my best to make time for him and I could see that he is also making his time for the family now. I could see his softer side now. I must say that I am happy for this kind of transformation. What takes us so long to figure this out Abah? Kan?

Oh God, I really miss him. I really love him. Is this some kind of home sickness? What is happening to me? An emotion stir-fry? I think I should probably go home this weekend and treasure the time with him. I just need to see his smile and I will be okay but will he be okay? What should I do to make him smile? That is THE question.

So Abah, I love you. I am thankful to Allah for giving me such a great father to lead us all. I remember watching this movie; "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close". There is a saying and I would like to dedicate this to you Abah. Here it goes:

"He promised us that everything would be okay. I was a child, but I knew that everything would not be okay. That did not make my father a liar. It made him my father."

Thank you for everything Abah!

Dilemma: I need a date!

Hiya peeps,

(Sigh). I started with a sigh merely because I do not know how to express this feeling. Stress? Not quite. Worried? Maybe. Anxious? Probably. Oh snap, it's a dilemma! Why oh why...

Let me start. There will be a gathering soon with some friends I used to know. Walking down the memory lane, I suppose. Some sort of reconnecting with old flings and also new friends within the group. I was invited.

It is scheduled to be on 15 November 2012. NEXT WEEK. I did say "Yes" last time when it was pre-scheduled. The reason being? Hmmm... everyone was waiting for my response and I did not want to look lame. Urgh... (Knock on my forehead)

The thing is, my ex is going to be there. My EX. My goodness, I really do not want to be there on my own and face the awkward music alone. At the same time, I do not want to cancel the trip. So not cool. Everyone will be there with their partners except me. How awkward that is?! :(

I need a DATE. Will someone be my date, please... I know, I know...I am such a loser at this junction but I am desperate and I do not want to go through the awkward moment alone where everyone is laughing and enjoy the trip with their special partner and I'd be laughing alone while looking at the phone screen (thanks to the invention of hand phones that helps us go through most awkward situations). 

Running away is another option. Somehow, it shows that I'm a coward if I resorted to that scheme. Might as well I just say "No" in the first place. Back then, I did not know that my Ex is going to be there!!!! Uwaaaaa.... what have I got myself into this time? Disastrous disaster, that is!


Again, I seriously need a date for this upcoming 15/11/12. I am serious. This is not a joke...well, it is..but the joke's on me. I know. Pretty please (I'm doing the blushing eyes thingy...you won't be able to see it though). 

Ok, that's all for my dilemma. 

Toodles :)