Cheers... a song for you... :(

Cinta Sampai Di Sini

D'Masiv

Mencoba tuk pahami
Mencari celah hatimu
Bila harus menangis
Aku kan menangis
Namun air mata
Ini telah habis

Segalanya telah kuberikan
Tapi kau tak pernah ada pengertian
Mungkin kita harus jalani
Cinta memang cukup sampai disini

Mencoba tuk rasuki
Menyentuh palung jiwamu
Bila harus mengiba
Aku kan mengiba
Namun rasa ini telah
Sampai di ujung lelahku

Segalanya telah kuberikan
Tapi kau tak pernah ada pengertian
Mungkin kita harus jalani
Cinta memang cukup sampai disini

Aaaaa

Segalanya telah kuberikan
Tapi kau tak pernah ada pengertian
Mungkin kita harus jalani
Cinta memang cukup sampai disini

Video: https://youtu.be/NU2g0gXzkD0

Lyrics: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/d/dmasiv/cinta_sampai_disini.html

Stormy days to come

Pheww... these few feeks have really taken a huge toll on me. I am drained! To death.

An unofficial news came in just today. Found out the Dean had a meeting with my soon-to-be Director. Also attended the meeting was the Deputy Dean.

They had a discussion on who should the department send for PhD next. Boy, according to the projection meeting last September, my turn would be (the soonest: early 2019). Now, the person who deserves to go next (2018) had a feud with...almost everyone. Why K, Why?!

They were questioning whether or not that guy has such commitment to pursue this course. Judging by his late 'unwelcoming' acts, they were not so convinced. The Dean said; if N is ready, we should send him first! Digging up the past, the Dean said; K did not even complete his MA on time last time!

Oh boy. This is bad. This is really bad!
1. I literally have no proposal prepared! Heck I don't even know what to pursue in... ASSessment? My ass!

2. If you skipped his turn (crossing my fingers they would never do that to him), it will DEFINITELY cause a huge fight, if not an unspoken feud between him and myself! It's not fair and I think he really wanted to go first. Turn-wise, it is his turn anyway. I CAN wait!

3. I need to settle things with my own family. With a baby on board, PhD sounds glitchy at the moment. Plus, I need to wait for my wife to at least finish her labwork! My poor baby... being left too soon..when you're just two months old :(

I hope they will not create a platform for dramatic competition between us two. Sok sek sok sek, to make it fair (their words), let's judge them based on their proposals. @#$%^& URGH! I don't have any..YET!

Alas, I'm hoping for a better sunny day soon. I really hope he would get the turn he deserves. And mine right after that. Woohoo...

Regret

Regret...

Meeting you for the first time is never a regret for me. Meeting you is by far one of the happiest turnouts events in my life. You are a kind person. A good friend indeed.

What I regret the most is... after many years of knowing US, one of us has changed. You used to back me up whenever I fall. You pushed me back up when I fell on the ground. You were my strength. Now, you've changed. You'd rather choose and back other people up. You chose to listen to others than what I had to say.

My fault. But I deserve this. WE deserve this! Let's just put an end to this. I loved you. I missed you so much. But what did I ever do to deserve this undeserving treatment you gave me? Why did u back him up? You knew nothing. You didn't know the story. You didn't know what happened. You SUCK!

Good luck with your life.

p/s - Had I known you were coming back to your hometown that day, I'd never come. I'm sorry I came unannounced. I just wanted to visit your family (whom I always think as my own family). That was darn awkward. I wish I could've avoided you but that was hard. Good to see you're happy though. Good for you.