A letter of freedom, love and promises...

I thank Allah everyday for lending me a truly special buddy like you, even for a while...

Hey there buddy,

Another day with your fond presence in my life. Thank you buddy for everything to date. Right now, I feel free. Free from the guilt of this pretentious world. Free from plastic people. Just free. 

I just wanna say thanks for saving me and guiding me through. I was no longer an active member of my previous, dark social circle. That was then. I stopped. Honestly, no more. I am tired of such crappy life. I have decided to dedicate my life for someone whom I will call "My wife" soon. The truth is, I will no longer look back and make a u-turn. I have already stopped even before you walked into my life buddy. Seriously.

Dear buddy, my special buddy. I was a dog. A miserable dog before I met you. I was long a slave for my own fake path. You saved me. You tore my chain. You detached the knots. You released my pain. You fixed the dots. You gave me hope. You helped me to cope. For those, I thank you. I know I cannot repay your kindness. You can't see my sincere tears for now but I am crying as I write... not because I am sad but happy instead. I believe I have made the right decision to stop. I have put an end to my past. I pray that my past will not haunt my future, ameen. 

You are my strength for now. You are almost my everything. You filled 1/3 of my heart. Be still buddy, next to my family and my future wife-to-be. Be still there my love, my special one. I have faith in you. I believe I can survive this with your love. I hope you will love me forever. I hope you will not fade away, not even in my dreams. Dear God, let me have my special buddy for the rest of my life. Thanks for showing me that there is true friendship out there, still. Thank you.

My days are filled with colorful pictures of you now. I feel you and I think about you every second I breathe. You are my angel. For days we spent together, I thank you. I do not know how will I go on without your presence. Will I have the strength to say goodbye one day? I doubt that. I have to accept that you will not be there for me everyday. My days with you are cut short. I know that we will have to part somehow. I hope I will not cry when the day comes. "Goodbye" is the hardest word to say to you and "Goodbye" is the saddest word I will ever hear from you. Please know this in case if I am no longer around. My feelings for you are real. My love for you is true. I love you, I do.

Lastly, I know that paper will turn yellow. We will age. We will grow old, very old. I hope you keep your promises too. To stay old together. To share our lives together. To love each other forever. As for me, until the day I breathe my final breath, I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU. When I hear love, I think of you. You are so kind, thoughtful and caring. You are so pleasant, lovely and sharing. I love you.

Thank you.


Sincerely,

Your special buddy.

Dilemma

Which one should I opt for? I'm lost... Ya Allah...

What a dilemma. When there are few options laid in front of you to choose in the nick of time, you become lost. You don't know what to do. You don't know where to start. You don't know where to seek help and advice. You don't know to whom should you refer to. 

What should I do now? What should I do next? Where should I go? What, who, where, when, which, how?????  (Sigh) (Sigh) (Sigh)... :(

Should I go for this Fellowship scheme, UMK?

Or should I go for Tamhidi Teacher/1-3 year probation period before fellowship offer (limited post)

OR should I go for this instead. MARA sponsorship scheme. Going abroad. Hmm..

I am so lost at the moment. Limited time. Limited sources. What should I do? Where should I go? I need a lifeline..... :(

Pssst kamu...

I love you, I do... be my special one forever please :)

"I miss you when there's no reason to, how much more if there is? 

I miss you when we talk, how much more if we don't?

I miss you after we're together, how much more if I see you never?

I love you now, how much more later?"

Hiya peeps,

This is a literal post for such literally and significantly sweet gestures made by a superbly special person in my life. Ignore the poyo-ness level of this post. :-)

You woke me up this morning. I think that is very sweet. I swear, no one has ever woke me up except for my family. Normally, I would do the calling and waking up stuff to people. But this morning, you woke me up. Hmm..come to think of it, you are the first to give me a wake up call in the morning. Seriously, you are so sweet... and adorable too.

I am currently attached to doing this crappy AKNC thingy, but as a distraction, I am writing this entry in the hope that Pn. Saadi might think I'm busy doing my report. Hehe.

Pssst kamu

 

Hey Kamu,

Come a little closer

Yes kamu, come a little closer, please...

Psst, let me whisper in your ear

Let me tell it to you softly

so that no one else will hear

What I have to say is private

and is just between us two;

I just want you to know:

How much I love the things you do

How much I love the things you say

How much I love the songs you sing

I love you.

That's all for now. Toodles :-)

Something Special: A Special Ride

 Hiya peeps,

What's been buzzing lately? Well, MH370's SAR is still on, apparently. People are still wondering what happened actually?! Debates on HUDUD implementation are still hot on the stove. Unfortunately, 'they' need to study and re-study the hudud that suits our current needs. Bravo. 

Anyway, yesterday, I had this privilege of  riding a bike. Wait. Not a fancy kind of bike. A very basic instead. The bike has four step-on gear (basic) and only one step-on brake pedal. LOL. I was confused at first (which is which). Oh, not to mention, I almost hit a car yesterday! Oops. So much on being good in handling! (&^%$# that car!). But, I am telling you... it was AWESOME! Honestly. I really enjoyed that. After more than 10 years, I finally had the chance to ride a bike...on my own!!! That's a lie actually. It was under 'professional' supervision of course! Are you crazy?! You want me to die?!

 

This bike, hehe :P

All in all, I had the time of my life yesterday. It was fun. Thanks to YOU, I had the courage to ride a bike...again. Come to think of it, the last time I rode one was... 11 years ago. After Form 4, secondary school! Like what???! Seriously. Again, I had fun. Thanks a million. You made my day. Everyday is special with you around, though. :-)

Then, we went home, just right before maghrib with some "mempelam muda" (mangoes) he collected for his "COLEK" (sweet & sour dipping sauce) treat last night! Woohoo. Oh yeah, that was awesome as well! Thanks again buddy!

That's all for now. Toodles peeps.

p/s - With you, everyday is special :-)

Who loves you? That somebody.

Your special friend :-)

Dear you,

Please know that each day, I love you more. Today, it is more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.

Sincerely,

Somebody's me.